On his drive home from work yesterday, 25-year-old Daniel Brentwood had his world rocked when he took note of a new billboard advertisement that maintenance staff had erected the day before.
“I was sitting there stuck in traffic when suddenly I looked up and saw the most beautiful woman I had ever seen on a 14’x48′ board towering 30 feet above me on the side of the highway,” Brentwood recounts.
Upon closer inspection, Brentwood realized that the woman was part of an advertisement for a new brand of vodka.
“I immediately knew the vodka would be of high quality,” he says. “The way photoshopped clouds strategically covered the most intimate parts of the model really gave me a lot of information about the nature of the drink and how it would taste.”
Before going back to his apartment, Brentwood decided to make a quick stop at his local liquor store, where he purchased a 750 milliliter bottle of the distilled beverage. A self-described “whiskey man,” Brentwood credits the ad for encouraging him to step outside his comfort zone and try something new.
“I am fully confident in my purchase, and I know I will enjoy drinking this vodka,” he says. “Thank you, naked billboard model, for letting me know about all the merits of this brand and its product!”
The subject of the billboard could not be reached for comment, but we assume she is probably just busy using her natural body to convince other idiots to buy stuff.